Four books to help you grow your confidence
Last time’s round up of books to help you grow your confidence proved so popular that I thought I’d follow up straight away with four more recommendations so here we go. This time we have books to help you with creativity, business, rest and happiness.
My first recommendation today is Big Magic by Elizabeth Gilbert of Eat, Pray, Love fame. If you have a creative side and you let fear or perfectionism hold you back from creating then this book is for you. The subtitle says it all – Creative Living Beyond Fear! The blurb on the back of the book says, “With profound empathy, wit and generosity, [Gilbert] offers potent insights into the mysterious nature of inspiration. Whether we are looking to write a book, make art, find new ways to address challenges in our work, embark on a dream long deferred or simply infuse our everyday lives with more mindfulness and passion, Big Magic cracks open a world of wonder and joy.”
I loved this book so much that I own the paperback, the kindle edition and I’ve listened to it on audible. It’s definitely more woo woo than any of the other books I’ve recommended so far but full of good advice, wisdom and support for your creative endeavours. I particularly love the letter she writes to fear in which she tells fear that she and creativity are about to go on a road trip together and she knows that fear will be along for the ride as that’s the way this thing works. There’s plenty of room for them all in the car but fear will not be allowed to drive. In fact fear will not even be allowed to touch the car radio. This has resonated with so many of my clients whether their goal has been creative or not.
My second book recommendation is for anyone thinking of starting their own business. Self Made – the definitive guide to business startup success. by Bianca Miller-Cole and Byron Cole. I bought my copy having heard Bianca speak at a Red Magazine event. Bianca was a finalist in The Apprentice in 2014. If, like me you’re a fan of the programme you will remember her idea for tights designed to match women’s natural skin tone. Even though she didn’t win the Apprentice she did go on to launch that company describing the final of the Apprentice as the best possible market research opportunity.
I found this book so useful when I was starting my coaching business. It certainly boosted my confidence, not only providing me with the information I needed to get started but also helping me to believe that I could do it. The blurb on the back of the book describes it as “The complete business start-up toolkit. An inspiring, wide-ranging handbook which combines practical tips and advice with energetic ideas to help you thrive and stand out from the crowd.”
If you’re just starting out or considering dipping your toe into the entrepreneurial world I highly recommend this book.
My third book today is on a very different theme. Those of you who have been around a little while will know that I’m a great believer in sleep as a vital part of our confidence toolkit. As such the title of this next book appealed to me enough to spend a Christmas book token on it. I was not disappointed. I read The Art of Rest – How to find respite in the Modern age by Claudia Hammond in January 2021 when, thanks to S.A.D – Seasonal Affected Disorder, going into a third national lockdown and two weeks of snow and ice that meant daily walks were not possible I was feeling low energy and low mood whilst my mind was racing.
I have to say it was well worth using my book token on it. The blurb on the back says, “Much of value has been written about sleep, but rest is different; how we unwind, calm our minds and recharge our bodies. The Art of Rest draws on ground-breaking research Claudia Hammond collaborated on: ‘The Rest Test’, the largest global survey into rest ever undertaken, completed by 18,000 people across 135 different countries. The survey revealed how people get rest and how it is directly linked to your sense of wellbeing. Counting down through the top ten activities which people find most restful, Hammond explains why rest matters, examines the science behind the results to establish what really works and offers a roadmap for a new, more restful and balanced life.”
So, what has this got to do with confidence? More than you would think. I have had clients use their coaching sessions with me to focus on just this – getting more rest, learning to unwind and stop. They have attached self-worth and self-confidence to always being useful, doing something productive, being of service to others and the day comes when they realise that they just cannot carry on that way.
How many of us have got ourselves into this state – feeling like every minute of our day needs to be productive? We need to rest. Rest is as essential as sleep. If you know that you need more rest and you enjoy a good read then I highly recommend The Art of Rest by Claudia Hammond.
My final recommendation is The Happiness Project by Gretchen Rubin. I’m a big fan of Gretchen’s writing. She describes herself as a writer who studies happiness, good habits and human nature. This was her first book on that journey. The blurb on the back cover describes how she “had an epiphany one rainy afternoon in the unlikeliest of places: a city bus. ‘The days are long, but the years are short,’ she realised. ‘Time is passing, and I’m not focusing enough on the things that really matter.’ In that moment, she decided to dedicate a year to her happiness project.”
It goes on to say, “In this lively and compelling account, Rubin chronicles her adventures during the 12 months she spent test-driving the wisdom of the ages, current scientific research, and lesson from popular culture on how to be happier.”
I read this over seven years ago - I know this because it’s this book that got me into the habit of keeping a daily happiness journal. Reflecting on my day last thing before I sleep and writing a sentence in my five-year journal. This has done so much for my confidence as well as happiness as it has made me realise how much positive stuff there is in my life and that the majority of that comes from how I choose to show up each day, the decisions I make and the actions I take. We are biased to focus on the negative so we have to make a conscious effort to focus on what’s gone well. I know that this book has inspired so many others to embark on their own happiness project. You don’t have to do the same but as I’ve also said before, we need to make sure that in the midst of the busyness of daily life we are making time to do the things that make us happy.
I hope these recommendations have provided some food for thought.
