Four years on: what I remember most isn't the treatment

Four years ago this week I rang the bell at the end of active treatment for breast cancer. It was the end of ten long months. Despite having to attend every treatment appointment alone, as covid rules still applied in NHS hospitals, I had lots of people to thank for supporting me.

On my last day of radiotherapy I took a card for the staff in the M&S café in the hospital. It had been so lovely over the four weeks I was attending for daily treatment to sit with a coffee surrounded by other people, even if we were all wearing masks. After having to stay away from other people for the duration of my treatment, to avoid it being delayed by covid, it felt like a little bit of normality.

The staff in the café were so kind and patient. They had a friendly word for everyone, no matter how busy they were. Even though they were wearing masks you could tell they were smiling. I wrote a card to say how much their kindness had meant and handed it to the woman who took my order. She read it, showed it to her colleagues and then leant over the counter, got hold of my hand and said, “With the best will in the world love, I hope we never see you here again.” And as the Christie hospital only treats cancer that meant the world to me.

I got my card out to pay for my coffee and the cake I was taking home to celebrate with mum. The older man who had made my drink beat me to the machine with his own card. By this point we were all crying!

Small kindnesses mean so much. They bring light in the darkest and hardest of times. And looking back, although there were some very dark and scary times during my active treatment, there were lots of moments of light too. These moments were often thanks to the kindness of others so that’s what I’m choosing to remember and celebrate on this anniversary.

What moments of light in the darkness have you experienced? These things are worth remembering and celebrating.