The joy of anticipation
In my last blog I shared how I was planning to be intentional this winter to ensure I don’t miss out on the things that I want to savour and enjoy and I encouraged you to create your own list. I find it particularly important at this time of year to be intentional about doing and experiencing things that I know I enjoy as I can suffer from seasonal depression. That said I do love Christmas even if my mood is low. And one of the things I like the most about Christmas is not the day itself or the presents but the anticipation!
There can be so much joy in anticipation if we allow ourselves to experience it. Often it’s half the fun. The anticipation of a holiday is as lovely as the holiday itself whether it’s your annual summer getaway or the time off you’re going to enjoy over Christmas.
It’s very easy though to get caught up in stress instead of joy. Getting ourselves stressed about everything being “perfect” whether it’s Christmas or a wedding or any other big event. Firstly, those of you who have been here for a while will know that I don’t believe that perfect actually exists. If that’s our mindset we’ll always find something to criticise.
And secondly our priorities should be different. We, our families, our children don’t need a perfect Christmas. We need an enjoyable one whatever that looks like to you. For some that’s 18 people squeezed around a table laughing, joking and yes, with the odd disagreement thrown in. For others that’s a get away to some far-flung place where everything isn’t about Christmas. And for most of us it will be something in between.
I’m trying to be as relaxed as possible about Christmas itself this year. I will be having chemo four days before and have no idea how I will feel on the day itself. Mum has already said that she won’t be cooking Christmas lunch until a day when I can actually enjoy it properly which could end up being nearer New Year’s day! That said though I’ll still be anticipating Christmas with as much joy as I can. There is so much I love about it that can wash over me as I lie on the sofa under a blanket.
The four weeks leading up to Christmas are the season of Advent. A time of preparation and contemplation as we approach Christmas day. A peaceful time in many ways. The complete antithesis of what is going on around us as the world of commerce does everything it can to persuade us to spend as much as we can on Christmas. I find this time really helpful in ensuring that I am spiritually prepared for the feast of Christmas, not just prepared with presents wrapped, food bought and the tree decorated! It helps feed my joy of the anticipation. Instead of behaving like Christmas is already here I am fully anticipating both the religious feast and the festivities of food and presents.
As a child I always had an Advent calendar. I loved the anticipation of opening that little door every morning at breakfast time, seeing what picture I got as we got closer and closer to Christmas. There didn't need to be chocolate or a toy in it for me to be excited to open it. In fact I don't think that there were calendars with toys in them - I'm showing my age now!
As an adult I like to read an Advent themed book every day. I have a couple of favourites that I re-read regularly, The Advent Calendar by Stephen Croft and The Christmas Mystery by Jostein Gaarder. Both are thought provoking helping me to focus on the meaning of Christmas. This year mum and I are reading Advent in Narnia: Reflections for the Season by Rev. Heidi Havercamp.
I remember in my Advent reading one year a wonderful description of the season of Advent as being like watching for the dawn. The sky turning slowly from deepest black to navy as the light begins to appear on the horizon. You know the light is coming. It’s that anticipation of the wondrous moment.
During my Advent I enjoy both the religious and the secular preparation for Christmas. But, some years I admit that the busyness of December means that the spiritual preparation is neglected and those years the celebration of Christmas always feels a little hollow. No matter how lovely the gifts or food it feels a little empty to me. That spiritual anticipation of the feast of Christmas is important to me.
Whatever your faith or tradition I would encourage you too to use December, this Advent season to concentrate on more than just the consumerism of the season. Find ways to be mindful, to be grateful, intentional and take care of yourself so that come the celebrations you can be fully present with those you love rather than burnt out and disillusioned by the whole thing.
But, I remind myself it’s up to me how and when I choose to anticipate and celebrate anything, especially Christmas. Just like it’s up to you. The most important thing is that you enjoy it. Enjoy the anticipation rather than get stressed about it. Prioritise what’s really important to you and let the other stuff go. Be intentional about the things you want to enjoy and savour and make sure you get to do them.
