Unlocking the secret to a happier and healthier life: the importance of fun

It’s almost the middle of May and I wonder if, like me, you chose an intention or word for the year, how it’s going?

The word I chose was fun because after the last, well I was going to say year, but between cancer and the pandemic, more like three years, I really felt I needed more fun in my life.

How has it been going?
Well I’ve had my ups and downs. The word pops up in my to-do app every day as a reminder. Do I actually have fun every day? No. Am I getting better at prioritising fun? Yes. But it does take effort.

So today I want to do two things. First I want to remind you to check in with any intentions, goals or resolutions you set yourself at the start of the year. How are they going? Are you making progress. If you aren’t is it because the intention or goal you set is no longer relevant and you need a rethink? Or do you need a reset? Think about why it hasn’t been happening and ways you can get yourself moving in the right direction again. If it’s going really well still have a think about what you’ve been doing so that you stay focused and on track.

And the second thing I want to do is to explore the concept of fun, its importance, and how we can have more fun in our lives. Because even if it isn’t your word for the year, it’s still really important that it’s part of your daily life.

This topic was inspired by Catherine Price's TED talk, "Why having fun is the secret to a healthier life," which delves into the idea that having fun can lead to not only happiness but also better health and in February I devoted a whole podcast episode to the topic. If you prefer to listen rather than read and would like a deeper dive into the topic, it’s episode 52 of Unlock Your Confidence with Clare Walsh.

What is Fun?
According to the Oxford English Dictionary, fun is defined as "light-hearted pleasure, enjoyment, or amusement; boisterous joviality or merrymaking; entertainment." However, Catherine Price argues that fun is more than just an activity that we do in our free time. Instead, fun is a feeling. And I have to agree. Price interviewed hundreds of people asking them to describe their memories of fun and unlike the dictionary definition which makes it sound quite frivolous instead she found that people described some of their most joyful and treasured memories.

So how do we ensure that we have more fun – that we manage to tap into this feeling if it isn’t the activity itself?

Well going back to Catherine Price she says that there are three factors to bringing fun into your life or creating more fun: playfulness, connection and flow

What is Playfulness?
Playfulness can be defined as an attitude or state of mind that allows us to engage in activities without taking them too seriously. Stuart Brown, a psychiatrist, clinical researcher, and founder of the National Institute for Play, identifies three types of play that we need:

• Body Play: Active movement with no time pressures or expected outcome. Examples include taking a walk or run in the woods, dancing around the living room, or doing yoga.

• Object Play: Using our hands to create something we enjoy with no specific goal in mind. Examples include knitting, drawing, gardening, or building with Lego.

• Social Play: Joining other people in seemingly purposeless social activities, from small talk to verbal jousting. Examples include having a meal with friends, playing board games, or attending a party.

The second factor is connection.
So you’ve chosen your playful activity now there needs to be some form of connection. This could be with other people in a group activity or it could be a deeper connection with yourself – listening to your thoughts on a walk for example. Or indeed it could be connection with your surroundings – letting go of distractions and connecting with the world around you whether that’s a walk in nature – in the woods or on a beach or losing yourself in the art works in a museum or gallery. It’s about being present and connected.
Which brings us very nicely to the third factor necessary in bringing fun into your life – flow.

We’ve all probably experienced this even if you haven’t heard the expression – being in flow before. That experience of being so engaged in what you’re doing that you completely lose track of time. You are in the zone and totally focused on what you’re doing. Now of course it is possible to be in flow and not having a fun time but if you have the other two factors we’ve talked about – playfulness and connection then combined with being in the flow and you’re having fun.

Playfulness, connection and flow. They are the three magic ingredients to achieving the feeling of having fun.

Flow on it’s own doesn’t necessarily equal fun, nor does connection nor does playfulness.
So now we know the three vital ingredients to having fun – playfulness, connection and flow  - how do we ensure that there is enough of it in our lives if, as Catherine Price argues, having fun is the secret to a healthier life?

Well, Catherine suggests the following:
First – reduce distractions so that you aren’t pulled out of the state of flow when you’re doing something you enjoy.

Second – increase your connections with people in daily life. Instead of gazing at a screen whenever you have a free moment try looking up and around you, making eye contact with people and saying hello. I’m not suggesting you start freaking out strangers by starting random conversations in the street but how often have you been at a work event or training day and get your phone out to avoid speaking to people. What if we tried the opposite just occasionally to increase connection?

Catherine’s third suggestion is find opportunities to rebel. Sometimes an activity can feel even more fun when we feel like we’ve made a little act of rebellion by breaking the rules of responsible adulthood. Her example is a group of mums who instead of heading home after the school run one Friday headed to the cinema together instead.

And finally prioritise fun. This doesn’t mean writing Thursday 6.30pm “fun” in your diary because let’s face it that’s one way of guaranteeing that Thursday at 6.30pm will not be fun. So, yes prioritise it not by blocking out hours when I WILL HAVE FUN because Clare said it’ll make me healthy but prioritise doing those playful activities with the people whose company you enjoy.

I hope this has given you plenty of food for thought. If you are struggling with with the goals or intentions you set yourself at the beginning of the year I have room in my calendar for Confidence Jump-start bookings.

This is for women who feel like they're spinning all the plates and not making any progress other than running themselves into the ground! You know you need to stop putting yourself last!

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