What motivates you?
Working with the women in my course last month was such a fabulous experience. The work we did together on values made me want to revisit this post from last summer as I think it’s so important to understand what motivates us.
Do you know what motivates you? It seems a simple enough question, but the answer can be many layered.
We often think that we’re motivated by things or achievements – having more money, a bigger house, a better car, nice holidays, a promotion. But, when we dig below the surface very few of us are motivated by these material things. What we are motivated by is our values. That’s not to say that we can’t or shouldn’t have material goals, but we should know how they fit with our personal values.
Most of us have financial goals whether related to our income, savings or working towards purchasing a bigger house or better car. But we will all have differing values behind those goals.
For me, my income goals are about security and being able to create memories with the people I love. For the woman who values independence and the ability to be spontaneous above everything else, earning enough money to allow her those freedoms will be really motivating.
Think about the people you see lining up to run a marathon. There will be so many motivations represented in that group of runners. People motivated by their value of contribution, raising thousands of pounds for charities. Runners motivated by their value of achievement. Others motivated by the value they place on health, or on adventure, success, self-respect, or competitiveness. It’s these values that will have got them out of bed on dark cold mornings to put in the training to get them across the finish line.
As a coach I help my clients to think about why they want to be, do or have the things they are working towards. What it is that is motivating them. And this always comes back to values, what's really important to them in life.
A client's goal is usually about so much more than what it appears to be on the surface. Monetary goals that are really about providing the means for the whole family to build memories through experiences, not just the bottom line on the bank statement. Health goals that are about living a vibrant, long and energetic life, able to enjoy children and grandchildren rather than just fitting back into those skinny jeans.
Whenever a client is struggling to find motivation for her own goal I can guarantee that it’s not fully aligned with her values. Sometimes the goal needs to be reassessed completely or just adjusted slightly.
Take, for example, the woman who wants to get her business off the ground but isn’t making any progress. She is constantly putting family time first as family life is one of her core values. So a reassessment is needed. How does this goal fit with her value of the importance of family life? Will sacrifices in the short term create a better life for the family in the long term? How could things be adjusted so that she can work on her business goal and still have the family time that is so important to her?
I have endless amounts of motivation when something is really important to me. When a goal is fully aligned with my values I can and will find a way to get where I want to be. When that motivation is lacking it’s a big red flag that the goal needs to be reassessed. It’s one thing not being motivated by your boss’s goal, but when it’s your own goal and you can’t find the energy or enthusiasm then there’s a problem.
Is there a goal where your motivation is distinctly lacking? Try asking yourself these questions:
What will achieving this goal give me?
How will it enrich my life or the lives of those important to me?
How will achieving this make me feel?
How will I feel if I don’t achieve my goal?
Use your answers to work out whether this is a goal you should still be working on or whether it’s time to reassess.
I hope that this has given you plenty of food for thought. I have a lovely facebook group where I provide daily inspiration to help you to build your confidence and create the life you love. Click here to join the conversation.
