Are you living as though you have endless tomorrows?
September is my birthday month and something dawned on me last week. My dad died when he was only 19 years older than I’ll be this weekend. And that shocked me - to the core! My immediate thought was, "Am I living as though I've less than two decades left?" And my gut reaction was no, absolutely not. A week on I’ve had time to reflect and the answer is still the same.
Like everyone else I'm hoping for a long, happy and healthy life, but I don't know that's what I'm going to get. In fact, I don’t even know that I’ll get another 19 years. I consider myself a very goal-oriented person. Not that surprising in a coach, I know, but I’ve always been like that. I’ve always had the next project on the go, the next thing I want to achieve and so if you’d asked me a fortnight ago whether I was pursuing my goals, my plans for my life I would have said yes without hesitation. But, my reflections over the last week have highlighted how much I’m missing out on. I’m a naturally cautious person. Spontaneity is most definitely not my middle name. I won’t spend money I haven’t got, for example. Which to be fair I do think is a pretty good philosophy, but added to my natural caution and ability to overthink it can mean I miss out on experiences.
Next week I’m going on holiday with my mum. We try to get away together for a week every year, usually in September around my birthday and usually in Britain. Last year on the last night of our holiday mum suggested that this year we go to Seville. I’ve been talking about wanting to go since I did my history degree many years ago now. “Clare, let’s just book it or you’ll be saying you want to go for another twenty years.” were her exact words. I, having had a large glass of red wine and in a mellow mood, agreed and mum got her phone out and we booked the holiday there and then. No time to think about how I was going to afford it, or what my budget was, we (or rather mum) just went for it. And I’m so glad she did. I’m really excited to be going after dreaming about it for so long.
I’ve also been talking about going to Assisi for just as long, if not longer. I’ve always been fascinated by the story of St Clare of Assisi as I was named after her and I took St Francis of Assisi as my Confirmation Saint. I have a list of goals in my journal and I’d tentatively put 2021 after it, but after my realisation last week it’s being brought forward to 2020. (Note to mum who I know is very loyal and reads my blog – do you fancy it?)
I know a few weeks ago I wrote about the importance of doing things just for fun. And I’ve written about my intentional summer – being mindful, present and enjoying the simple pleasures. But, last week’s realisation was a wake up call. My “fun” goals, the ones that are about experiences and seeing the world can’t keep being put on the back burner until there is more time or more money. It’s time to stop being so cautious when it comes to my fun goals. It’s up to me to make the time and the money and get out there and do them. So, that's what I'm going to do. Watch this space.
What goals need to move up your priority list? How are you going to ensure that happens?
