I choose to be intentional each season as it’s so easy in the busyness of life to miss out on the things we love because we assume that we’ll get around to it at some point but before we know where we are the summer is over and we never did get that walk on a beach or take that Sunday afternoon bike ride through the woods or visit the pick your own fruit farm. If we aren’t careful the things that could get done at any time end up not getting done at all.

A couple of autumns ago I called my blog “What will bring you joy this season?” and I’ve asked myself the same question today. No matter what is going on in my life what little things are going to bring me joy that I’d rather not miss?

It’s a new season and as I shared in episode 21 of my podcast, Unlock Your Confidence with Clare Walsh September feels like the other New Year – a chance for reflection and a fresh start. As such I have revisited my manifesto – my why and as we have so many new people in our community I thought it would be good to share it with you too again.

In last week’s podcast episode I talked about how for many people September is the other New Year. In the northern hemisphere the new school year begins and it feels like a new start as life begins again after the lazier days of summer.

Whether you have been away this year or spent your summer in your own garden or local park it is often a time when we stop and consider our lives, just like we do over the Christmas and New Year holiday. In the past I've referred to this as sun lounger ponderings although given the fact that the British summer can be far from sunny at times they don’t always take place on a sun lounger!

In the episode I gave you some concrete ways you can use this time to reflect on what you want and move yourself forward with your goals. I’m aware that not everyone is a podcast listener so I thought I’d share more in today’s blog. And, if you have listening to the podcast – thank you – and now you have a handy written guide too!

I love this time of the year. I make no secret of it. I love the amount of daylight we get and the warmth. Even a wet British summer can’t dampen my spirits. In June when I wrote about what I wanted from my summer I called it “Are you making time for the things that bring you joy?” I want you to ask yourself the same question today. And if you aren’t what small action could you take to ensure that every day you do something that brings you joy? That makes you appreciate life.

We live in a world of noise. Even in lockdown when we were at home and there were less cars on the road and planes in the sky and so the world was a little quieter we were able to fill that void with news, music, tv, podcasts, radio, video calls, audio books and on my estate an almost constant noise of power washers and lawn mowers during daylight hours.

Last May I shared…I’ve been going out for daily walks. Most days with my headphones in listening to a podcast or audio book. On Easter Sunday I was out at lunchtime and took out my earbuds and for the first time in all my daily walks I couldn’t hear anything at all but the buzzing of insects and singing of birds. Not a single engine – no distant car or train. No lawn mowers. No human voices. No dogs barking. Nothing but the insects and the birds. I live in a large housing estate on the edge of a very big town. It was profound. It was an experience probably never to be repeated without being in the depths of the countryside.

I’ve been telling myself that walking the same streets every single day for nearly two months now I need a book or a podcast to stop me getting bored. But is that really true? Am I just trying to hide from my own thoughts?

I’m passionate about helping women to lead the life that lights them up now, not at some undefined point in the future. To do that we have to be able to listen to and trust our own inner wisdom and that means listening to our own thoughts.

“It’s not all about massive transformations, little transformations make a massive difference!”

One of my clients said this to me a few weeks ago and it really got me thinking. She is so right. I think a lot of people think that choosing to work with a coach is about having a massive goal and wanting to make a huge change in your life but this couldn’t be further from the reality of coaching! My client hit the nail on the head. It is those little transformations – the changes in your thinking, behaviour and understanding of yourself - that added together make a massive difference to life.

The women I work with come from all sorts of backgrounds. Employed, self-employed, out of work after redundancy, mums looking to return to work, women who’ve just been promoted, women starting or growing businesses or side hustles, the list goes on. And these women range from their early thirties to their sixties. I love the variety. The common theme is a desire for confidence and clarity in order to move forward and that’s what motivates them to invest the time, energy and money in themselves. What is the difference between them and the women who keep telling me and themselves that they’d love to work with me, to do my course or group coaching programme but they just can’t find the time or the money?

I can’t believe that it’s two years ago since my website went live and I published my first blog after what felt like weeks of work and the steepest of tech learning curves. So much has changed in those last two years, a lot of which has been unexpected – yes covid-19 I’m looking at you! But, some of those changes have been planned and welcomed.

Last year, to mark the first birthday of the blog I re-shared the first blog I wrote. This year I want to highlight 12 blogs from the last year that I think contain little gems – advice that we all need to hear! I’ll link them all so that you don’t have to go hunting!

In March I wrote about what I wanted to ensure that I experienced during the spring months - lockdown restrictions allowing. My list included:

• Posies of cut flowers from my garden

• Giving the garden a good spring tidy

• Savouring a cup of tea in the garden (even if I have to wrap up to do it)

• Learning to cook a new seasonal recipe

• Vases of daffodils and tulips

• Eating a meal outside

• Celebrating Easter

• Rediscovering my spring wardrobe

• Starting to run again and getting out for weekly runs in the nature reserve so I can watch the season change and develop

• Learn to recognise even more bird songs

• A walk on the beach (I’ll be relying on lockdown restrictions to lift for this one!)

Despite having one of the coldest springs on record I’ve managed most of these except the posies of cut flowers from my garden.

At the moment we’ve had a lot of our normal freedoms curtailed and so yes we are waiting for permission to do lots of things that we’d not even think about normally. I originally wrote that sentence twelve months ago. Who could have predicted that twelve months on we’d still be waiting for permission to do some things?! But where else in your life are you waiting for permission?

I know I’ve been very guilty of this in the past and I catch myself sometimes even now. Waiting for permission to go ahead and start working towards the dream that I have for myself. Waiting for permission to pursue the life that I know will make me happier. The life that lights me up.

Who do I think is going to give me permission? Whose approval am I looking for? I’m a grown woman, proud of my independence and yet it still catches me out. This sense that I need permission to create the life that lights me up. To lead my life in a way that will be fulfilling and happy for me.

Last week’s podcast episode was all about whether or not you believe in luck. One of the dangers I pointed out of over belief in luck is that we can start putting everything good that happens to us down to luck and chance rather than acknowledging the hard work, dedication, experience, skill, tenacity, talent or creativity that got us there. We listen to people telling us how lucky we are to live in this house, have that job, be in this relationship and if we’re not careful we start to believe that it’s all down to luck and pure chance too.

We're living through an unprecedented time. The things that we thought were certain turned out not to be. Whoever, other than in the pages of a dystopian novel, imagined closed borders, grounded flights, closed schools and shops, closed restaurants and pubs, people working from home, furloughed staff?

I wrote those words in the middle of May last year. Who knew that then end of April 2021 we’d still be waiting for things to return to some semblance of normal? Perhaps it was a good thing we didn’t know, making it easier to be optimistic and deal with each new curve ball that 2020 threw at us!

Last year I wrote about how fear of failure holds us back and I’ve decided it’s time to revisit it as over the last few weeks I’ve spoken to so many women who, having added twelve months plus of lockdowns and restrictions into the mix, are feeling even more fearful of failure than ever. But, after what we’ve all been through and are still going through, I think it’s more important than ever to be moving forward rather than holding ourselves back.

This time last year I began my Easter blog with, “This is my favourite time of year. I love Easter, but this is going to be an Easter like no other.” Little did I realise that twelve months on Easter isn’t going to be very different to last year. I’ll still be attending church services virtually thanks to social distancing rules but at least I’ll be with my mum this year. This time last year there were no support bubbles so I’m truly grateful for the fact mum and I can celebrate Easter together. And of course this year we know that we are on the journey out of the pandemic. We have a road map. I’m not sure how I would have coped if as I wrote last year I’d realised that this Easter wouldn’t be so very different!

I’m a great believer in journaling. It helps me to sort out my thoughts, to tap into my subconscious, to come up with solutions to problems and connect with my own wisdom. I hear so many women though saying that they'd love to journal but they just don't know where to start. Hopefully this will give you a few helpful pointers!

Three national lockdowns and the local lockdowns in between have taught me to be even more appreciative of mother nature and the green spaces around me. During February I even began to teach myself to recognise different bird songs. Something I always thought too difficult, but it turned out to be far easier than I thought and has brought me enormous amounts of joy.

Over the last few weeks I’ve got back into the habit of taking a daily walk. Something I’d let lapse during the two weeks we had snow and ice in January and had to make a conscious effort to start up again during February.

It feels like the world is brimming with life, energy and colour after the winter. That’s how I want to feel too.

There are lots of things that hold us back from doing what we really want to do but the one that comes up so often in coaching sessions is worrying about what other people think.

I hear clients telling me (and themselves) stories about lack of money and time or knowledge but when we dig a little deeper those things can be overcome and then the truth surfaces. A fear of what other people will think is holding them back. A fear of what other people will say.

And it’s not always the big things like changing career or moving home. I’ve spoken to women who’ve held themselves back from trying a new hobby, buying a new car or at least the car they really want, changing their hair, dressing differently, drinking less alcohol, having a different sort of holiday than they usually do. All because they are worried about what other people will think or say.

I have a lot of clients who tell me that they don’t like change, that they don’t cope with it well. But, more often than not it turns out to be a story they’ve been telling themselves for years rather than a truth! When I ask, “Oh, so you don’t like going on holiday?” or “You’ve never wanted to change job or move house or leave home or go to university…?” it starts my client thinking. The truth is that lots of us find some changes in our lives uncomfortable but change can also be longed for, it can be exciting, it can be a relief from boredom and monotony. But when we keep repeating the words, “I don’t like change” to ourselves, then guess what, we make change uncomfortable, we make ourselves fearful and we make things harder and less enjoyable that they could be.

What does it mean to be brave?

Often I think we see or hear this word and think of heroic action. Of doing what needs to be done in dangerous circumstances. Of medals awarded to members of the emergency services and armed forces. But there is also everyday bravery. Those acts of courage necessary to move our lives forward. Asking the person we like whether they’d like to go for coffee. Asking for a pay rise. Applying for the promotion. Deciding to change career. Speaking up in a meeting.

As regular readers will know I have seasonal affective disorder (SAD) and this year with the added stress of the pandemic it’s been a bit like dealing with winter on steroids! A whole other layer of crazy! As such I thought it may be a good time to revisit the blog I wrote on hygge last winter as I think nurturing ourselves is needed more than ever right now. I have friends and clients struggling with winter who’ve never had an issue with it before.